Thursday, September 29, 2011

You know you are a twin mom when...

In the past week I have had 3 different people tell me that I should write a book of my parenting "experiences" with twins.  I have to laugh at that thought because the book would be so crazy that I don't think most would believe it to be true.  So I have, instead, come up with a list of things that truly have made an impression in my "first time mom" brain.

You know you are a twin mom when:

1)  You literally feel like a paralyzed cow when trying to nurse your babies at the same time.  With no hands to move the babies around, nursing sometimes required a helping hand. (super embarrassing when it's not your husband).

2)  Your babies cry while you and your husband place bets on which child it is that is crying.  And then within minutes, both babies are crying. 

3)  Both babies are crying and needing your attention and you can't hold both at the same time so, looking at them, you have to choose which one to comfort first.  Only to be followed by your own tears because you chose one over the other and have to sit there and listen to the child left behind cry.

4)  You ask yourself, "did I just feed you, or the other baby?"  Only to be followed by the next question, "did I just change your diaper or the other baby?"  Talk about being delirious!

5)  You have mastered the art of juggling.....babies that is!  And the question "which one do you want to feed/hold/bathe/change?" becomes common language.

6)  While chasing after one crawling baby, your pants are being pulled down by the other baby.  Yes, this actually happened.

7)  You witness a food fight more often than not.  Which didn't start as a food fight, or resemble a food fight, but ended up everywhere and on everything.

8)  You are constantly asked "Are they twins?"  And think to yourself...."here's your sign!"  Followed with "are they identical?"  To which you think, "Come on....really....are your eyes working properly?"

9)  When there aren't enough hands to go around, you will use anything to hold a bottle....including your foot.

10) You find yourself flinging babies up onto you like you are flipping pancakes.

11)  You hear the words "I don't know how you do it."  And think "I'm not quite sure either..." 

12)  You secretly envy all pregnant women who are only carrying one child, or a mom who only has one infant, and think to baby would be a piece of cake!

13)  You have to go grocery shopping, and have to bring the kids, but both baby carriers won't fit in the cart, so you strap one to you and put the other in the cart.  And while you are shopping, people stare at you like you are from Mars.

14)  You have a completely new appreciation for the phrase "silence is golden."

15)  Best of all, you get to witness the most special bond between two siblings that you could ever imagine.  Watching them hold hands, laugh at each other, talk to each other and love on each other.